am i just buried deeper than you want to go
or am i forgotten and will i ever know
should i stop wondering and just let go
oh oh, how can i know which way to go
oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
so what can i say about what happened yesterday
if it is forgotten does it matter anyway
is there any feeling when certain songs play
is it meaningless noise or something
you just push away
oh oh oh oh, do you want me to stay
oh oh oh oh, how am i to know
if you never say
am i supposed to read your silence
as wishing i would would understand
how afraid you are of losing me
am i supposed to take your hand
or just accept your silence
as the closing of a door
are you trying to tell me
you don't want me any more
has too much time passed for love to last
or there still an endless glow
in the window of your heart for me
how am i supposed to know
oh what should i do
should i still want you
should i let you go
how am i to know
when you don't say a word
at least none that i've heard
am i missing something
can you hear me sing
am i just buried deeper than you want to go
or am i forgotten and will i ever know
oh oh oh oh, do you want me to stay or go
oh oh oh oh, how am i to know
in the blink of an eye
everything can change
the sight between the lashes
can be so strange
infinite fractals beyond perception
seeks belief to exist
string theory plus quantum conception
entanglement assist
reason and logic enters suspension
blind the top of the list
the mind of god is beyond comprehension
everything else is missed
what you believe defines you
even if you think you believe nothing
what you believe designs you
even if silence is the song you sing
are you ready for mass extinction
or do you live in mass delusion
where truth and lies have no distinction
you are the maker of your illusion
black holes, light years, dark matter, inflation
miracles may simply be what you cannot explain
blind faith, second sight, everything in relation
everything is everywhere can drive a mind insane
what fear is stronger
what's been around longer
fear of the unknown
or fear of not knowing
to be or not to be
is relativity
what is you, what is me
what is infinity
what is eternity
what do you want to see
makes your reality
even if it's fantasy
what you believe defines you
even if you think you believe nothing
what you believe designs you
even if silence is the song you sing
can it become more clear
you find what you seek here
genius or madness or bliss or fear
whatever you want will appear
when you believe you are aware
when you are aware
what you believe defines you
even if you think you believe nothing
what you believe designs you
even if silence is the song you sing
it may have come
out of the blue
or somewhere else
we never knew
and still what's true is true
and this is true
what you believe defines you
even if you think you believe nothing
what you believe designs you
even if silence is the song you sing
when memories fail...
as they do in an aging mind
the written words will keep you
from being left behind
when the mind goes...
as it does as time goes by
the written words will keep you
alive
and high
blues come when we forget who we are
lows come when we forget what we mean
depression comes when we forget the star
we wished our dreams upon
and life is over when we forget why we were here
when we are gone
the saddest thing in life may be
when we are gone before we die
when we forget and we are forgotten
when trust is betrayed
especially when you trust someone
with the memories, the dreams,
and all the plans you've made
when memories fail...
as they do in an aging mind
where are the written words
we left behind
when the mind goes...
as it does as time goes by
where are the written words
that kept me high
all the reminders i wrote
where are the words
all the songs i sang
the songs you never heard
i trusted you with all that
all the words i wrote to you
and the tapes made to be the map to me
who understands?
i trusted you with all that
the map that leads to me
can you remind me now
who i am?
when memories fail...
we never learned the normal ways of sharing
we learned to live believing no one really cares
so we ignore the holidays most people celebrate
because we don't want to feel disappointments or despairs
in our defense
we're happier living without expectations
that way each day brings to life a new surprise
and yet sometimes we feel we let others down
do they see sadness in the way we won't look them in the eyes
in our defense
can we try to break the habit of avoidance
if we realize sharing means more than any defense
we hope you understand
we live in the present tense
and all our lives we've been waiting
for a gift that may never arrive
we try not to think about that
in this depression, it helps us survive
shifting gears and tempo now
trying to break out
pause bump pause bump
what's this all about
. . .
walking down the street
feeling incomplete
waiting for a gift that may never arrive
wondering why we stay
why we wake up every day
looking for a reason to be alive
if we focus on each moment
not stressing over what each step meant
we just may find
that just being alive
can be exciting
and that brings a smile to my heart
and some peace to my mind
or is it all just our illusion
. . .
in our defense we do a lot of avoiding
and truth is we each see just what we want to see
all the confusion may just be an illusion
and some prefer delusion to reality
and we may not always see everything the same way
and we may not always see eye to eye
but in our defense we have a common goal
so we can always try
to never say goodbye
and when the words don't seem to explain
everything we mean to say
we can trust the silence
and not let it get in the way
for in our silence we am still caring
and in our silence we are still sharing
and in our defense
in our struggle to survive
and then we sing the song we never heard
lost and found in and between each word
. . .
if you think nobody cares
well, i do
i may not always show it in ways
you want me to
i don't always feel good enough
to share the way i feel
but that doesn't mean it isn't
just as real
so i wrote these words because
i want you to know
i love you
even when it doesn't seem to show
when you feel alone
when the day does not seem worth waking up for
living on your own
when no one calls or knocks upon your door
in this busy life
when no one seems to have the time to show they care
if you look around
you'll find me there
when you call my name
i'll be there
